Endings

I’m sitting in another hospital room, this time my father lies on the bed no longer conscious enough to respond to talk or touch.

His breathing raspy and harsh for a few moments then nothing for a few moments more. His body is reaching the end of its fight. It’s been a week since the stroke.

I think he’ll pass away today. He held on to see my brother and sister, he held on through Christmas Day but tomorrow is my birthday and I selfishly don’t want him to pass then.

My mother and hubby have gone to get coffee and I should be spending this alone time thanking him for all the good things and telling him how much I love him but instead I’m rendered mute.

Tears fall from my eyes and the only voice I can muster is to speak with my fingers, on here. Typing into the void.

May you Rest In Peace Dad. I love you.