Category: Mental Illness

Identity and Grief

I’m constantly struggling to understand myself. Understand my selves. Unfortunately my memory of past events is so compartmentalised that every now and then something happens to challenge my beliefs about who I think I am and it throws me for a loop. My understanding… Continue Reading “Identity and Grief”

Dark Winter

We had discussed music in our therapy appointment. Music holds a lot of power over us, it can calm us down from a manic rampage or send us spiralling into madness depending on the day. We love every shade of it and treasure it’s… Continue Reading “Dark Winter”

Mind Condos

This is a page from the old journals from 2018, I think Katie wrote it before splitting with Ezzy… it’s an example of some de realisation dissociation and mild paranoia experienced at the time. Today I went grocery shopping with Miss 9. Sounds like… Continue Reading “Mind Condos”

All The Kings Horses

“All the kings horses and all the kings men, couldn’t put humpty together again” It’s May 12th again. Now 6 years since the start of the suicide attempt saga that should’ve ended our life, yet here we are. The story of this suicide attempt… Continue Reading “All The Kings Horses”

Seeds of Hope

Hope can be a dangerous thing, too little and we exist as a husk blowing through the winds of life. Too much and we risk the crushing disappointment of loss, failure or rejection. After a lifetime of protectively exiling hope from my thoughts, I… Continue Reading “Seeds of Hope”

A Dissociative Experience

I’ve been trawling through some of our old writings recently and found the below. I think it is a reasonable example of a dissociative experience and ‘co-consciousness’ written by one of the others a year or so ago and I thought it might be… Continue Reading “A Dissociative Experience”

Drama Queen

You know those people that never shut up? It feels like their life has been an endless soap opera and it’s exhausting to listen to them moaning and complaining. Surely they bring this shit upon themselves, surely they love the drama, feed off the… Continue Reading “Drama Queen”

Set Us Free

I was supposed to go into the city to have a blood test today to check I’m ok for chemo on Monday but the blood test place is shut due to the Easter long weekend even though Google says it’s open I rang to… Continue Reading “Set Us Free”

Invisible Tripwires

*This is a throw back from our drafts folder circa June 2020 ish? Pre cancer diagnosis but while knowing we were physically unwell and attempting to find out what was wrong. – Kate Most of the time my life feels like a well known… Continue Reading “Invisible Tripwires”

Forgettery

Last week we seem to of accidentally opened Pandora’s box of mental madness by opening up in therapy a little about one of the childhood trauma things we’ve been avoiding and now it seems I’m struggling to regain control. I keep wandering the house… Continue Reading “Forgettery”