THE COLOUR OF MADNESS
A Blog About Living with Mental Illness
Category: On My Soapbox
Lemonade
I have just seen the report from my recent PET scan and there’s no evidence of metastasis showing up!I’m currently cancer free, stage four can kiss our ass because it’s time to make lemonade from all the bitter lemons we’ve been gathering for so… Continue Reading “Lemonade”
System Failure
Miss S took an overdose. 80 pills. She’s alive, but I have no details of how long they were in her system before they got her to hospital and started the drug to counter the effects. I don’t know if there’s long term liver… Continue Reading “System Failure”
*Strangled Cat Noises*
I HATE not being able to fix things. I’m a fixer, that’s what I do. It’s my coping with chaos strategy: suck it up, see it out, hold back all the feeling stuff shit. God knows I’ve dealt with enough chaos to last a… Continue Reading “*Strangled Cat Noises*”
The Blank Page
As a wannabe writer, I live with the age old fear of being struck down with ‘writer’s block’. The rumour is that it’s always there, lurking in the background, threatening to steal our calling, our passion at a moments notice. I usually find it… Continue Reading “The Blank Page”
Playing With Fire
I nearly burned myself again yesterday. On purpose I mean, to get that twisted release that comes from binding yourself too tightly for too long until you explode in a senseless torrent of vile self-hatred leaving you with the need to die immediately. But… Continue Reading “Playing With Fire”
Just Call the F*ing Helpline
You know what is silly? I got so overwhelmed, upset and suicidal recently that I finally actually called Lifeline. That’s not the silly part, that was the smart part, the silly part is the reason I was calling was because I was feeling really… Continue Reading “Just Call the F*ing Helpline”
Police Brutality & Mental Health Crisis
I am feeling frustrated and angry right now, abuse of power within the police force is hardly a new concept – people in positions of authority are known for becoming bullies, they get a taste of that power that comes with control and they… Continue Reading “Police Brutality & Mental Health Crisis”
Happiness & The Power of You
Happiness is something that happens within conscious thought, happiness is an emotion just like sadness. It is something we have the ability to feel even when things in our lives are difficult, even when we are still aware of physical pain, It might not… Continue Reading “Happiness & The Power of You”
The Root Of All Evil
They say that money is the root of all evil and perhaps that is true, but I tend to think that fear is, or perhaps they go hand in hand. I mean guilt and fear certainly make a lot of people a lot of… Continue Reading “The Root Of All Evil”
I’m Not Lazy, I’m Bipolar
I often get asked the question “your kids are all at school now, why don’t you go back to work full time?” and it always leaves me floundering a bit for a socially acceptable explanation. It’s hard to tell people that I struggle with… Continue Reading “I’m Not Lazy, I’m Bipolar”
THE COLOUR OF MADNESS 