Dodgy Poetry / Lyrics

I like writing (in case you hadn’t noticed) and as well as banging on about mental health stuffs and complaining about the state of the world, I also like to write lyrics and poems and general rhyming lark – yes, I admit it, usually it’s when I’m manic and there can even be an occasional limerick thrown in for good measure…

Sadly I have the musical talent of an Emu with laryngitis so tunes don’t really follow the lyrics and they tend to be written in my mind to the tune of something else which I don’t remember later so I will just call them poems rather than songs I suppose and let them stand as they are…

So I’m going to whack a bunch of the ones I just found on my phone in here to peruse at your leisure, should you happen to be into that kind of thing.


Goodbye Notes

 

IMG_8597

The circle of life may have no end,

But the marksman still draws his arm,

And the target carved into my back,

Ensures my fate will come.

Dropped a feathered pen into the ink,

Scratched a semi colon upon my wrist.

A symbol of hope and infinity,

To remind me I still exist.

Yet as time wore on hope wore away,

I realised full stops are circles too.

So now I’m writing you goodbye notes,

And bleeding you my truth.

The last time I saw your face,

It was beneath a mask of false pretense.

I felt the sorrow in my eyes meet with yours,

As we tried to pretend it all still made sense.

My broken mind, your shattered heart,

Our diamonds in the rough.

No matter how much we polished them,

They could never shine through enough.

Now the time has come for me to say farewell,

As the sun sets on my endless dawn.

New horizons await you bold and bright,

Move forwards, carry on.

But if you ever need me still,

Simply call me and you’ll see,

That I’ll be waiting in the garden,

By that big old apple tree.

I’ll listen to your stories,

I’ll listen to your dreams.

I’ll remind you of what you’ve forgotten,

And show you who you can be.

And then we’ll laugh together through memories,

As the light fades beyond the trees,

And I’ll tell you how much you matter,

And what you meant to me.


Magic Wand

 

The beggars they’ve got the best of you,

they all want to see you fail,

year after year you tread this path,

sing your sordid tale.

Oh wave your magic wand,

my learned vagabond,

wish yourself some whisky,

chase yourself some tail.

But where at the bottom of the bottle,

is the meaning of your life?

Another year won’t kill you,

you’ve gathered tokens by your side.

Where can you lie now?

To best avoid the fight.

The past is catching up with you,

and you’re hiding in plain sight.

Apologise nostalgically,

for what you used to do,

1000 days of sobriety, 1000 lies from you.

When did it all go so wrong?

When did the earth stand still?

We gather back to our oldest songs

upon that greatest hill.

Oh wave your magic wand,

my learned vagabond,

wish yourself some whisky,

chase yourself some tail.

Impart your magic wisdom,

to those who pass you by,

because your time it will be over,

I’m the blinking of an eye.

Sing us songs of courage,

sing us songs of why,

tell us your tales of wonder,

and let us dance with you through the night.


Acid Rain

IMG_8617

 Drifting through the currents of my mind,

I find myself lost in a sea of thoughts,

Through high tides and low,

The darkness and the dawn

We weathered the storms together,

But this journey takes me alone.

 I counted the grains of the sands of time,

As we built their castles and they fired their shells.

Days turned to weeks, to months, into years

Marooned by expectations,

 and the mystery of why we were even here. 

Let me sleep tonight,

Untouched by this acid rain,

Let me close my eyes,

Let me forget the pain.

Worn out stories like broken records play,

Please save me from myself,

Please take my dreams away. 

I’m frightened by the vastness of this ocean,

And what lurks beneath its waves,

What might come back to bite me,

When the sunlight starts to fade. 

Sharks circle around our heels,

As we tread water in a dying world,

But the only thing left to find here,

Isn’t even real.

 Shipwrecks lined our shores and we asked ourselves, how?

Salt water burns into my cracking pores,

It’s too late for apologies now. 

We fought against the flow,

But were pulled further out to sea,

Everyday fading faster,

Banished by stolen memories.

 Our eyes reflect broken souls,

Haunted by voices of the past,

The sirens song that lured us,

To a long forgotten farce.

 Let me sleep tonight,

Untouched by this acid rain,

Let me close my eyes,

Let me forget the pain.

Worn out stories like broken records play,

Please save me from myself,

Please take my dreams away.


Wolves

IMG_8626Throw me to the wolves again, I’m sober.

Feed me to the dogs now that I’m clean.

It’s not a path Ive chosen to go down,

but it’s the path that was laid out for me.

Mercury’s retrograde tried to destroy us,

like shooting barrels of fish by the sea.

Took from me my friends and my colleagues,

but I won’t let it take my family.

The feelings are coming back again,

the tides are on the change,

no matter how hard I try to stop them,

it always plays out the same.


Golden Toupee

They say the flow of blood is optional,

but the tides are getting stronger my dear.

The picket lines are widening,

across lands held by guns and fear.

How much longer will the people stand,

for degradation, discrimination and pain?

Until we win the fight for a land of equality,

our cries no longer echoing in vein?

When will we remove the power we invested in,

a lizard man dressed up as an orange baboon?

The creature takes off his golden toupee,

shining impossibly in the light of the moon.

I will not stand as a silent warrior,

I was born to privilege by luck, not right

we battle a false democracy,

votes count for nothing in this fight.

As this war marches on and on,

the bad guys haven’t won.

From living rooms and street corners,

they chanted across the globe, 

picket lines of solidarity,

of acceptance, love and hope.

This is an enemy we won’t stand for,

but neither will we sit down.

Together We rise up, united against a common clown.

The ridiculousness of the situation,

seems like part of a bigger plan,

it leaves the masses questioning,

who’s really holding the hand.

Are we blind to a new world order,

actually created by the man, but

demanded by the people,

by mothers across the lands?

You can’t tell us what we want,

it’s gotta be our idea,

so throw in crazy racist homophobes,

to control the world with fear.

We come together today,

from all corners of the globe,

we are shouting out our message,

of love, of freedom, of hope.

I will not stand as a silent warrior,

I was born to privilege by luck, not right

we battle a false democracy,

votes count for nothing in this fight.

As this war marches on and on,

the bad guys haven’t won.


White Walls

As dawn rises again from my window,

and the birds sing their morning call,

It’s clear to me now I’m a drifter in my own life,

and maybe you were never here at all.

My mind has turned against me,

and I’m in a room with an unlockable door,

inside a white walled hospital, on the only locked floor.

Haunted by voices and shadows we can’t outrun,

we are hidden from the world, separated from loved ones.

Victims of a common enemy,

we are now essentially owned,

held by a government institution,

our rights are no longer our own.

You even watched me as I showered,

threatening to put electrodes on my brain,

you couldn’t imagine my thoughts,

and you couldn’t feel my pain.

Yet you still tried to control me,

feed me pills until I was numb.

You can’t be a threat to anyone,

when left drugged, immobile and dumb.

My mind has turned against me,

I’m in a room with a padded floor,

inside a white walled hospital,

on the only locked floor.

Surrounded by my peers,

the crazy, depressed and insane,

we are fighting a battle against ourselves,

against our stigma and our shame.

We might be a little lost,

but we’re still people too,

Men, Women, young or old,

one day we may even be you.


The Path To Nowhere:

His journey is a lonely one,

He travels through the night,

On a long path to nowhere,

Just looking for his light.

Living his life out in the open,

But still hidden from everyone,

On this long path to nowhere,

What has driven him to run?

 She rides in the daylight,

Hair gleaming in the sun.

But it’s an act of desperation,

In the disguise of being fun.

 On a long path to nowhere,

She got lost along the way,

Everything at her doorstep,

But she just wants to run away.

 And they sang together in the moonlight,

From the darkness of their caves,

100s of miles between them,

But nothing had really changed.

 It seems that time waits for no one,

As we swim through its sandy hills.

Only our faces wear the lines,

Etched by the battles of our wills.

They say it’s not about the outcome,

But about what we have learned.

Yet the grass is always greener,

After the lands been blackened and burned.

Final,ly fate turned a corner,

And from the shadow lands emerged,

The rider in her costume,

Standing silently upon the verge.

Across the hills the sun slowly set,

Lighting up nowhere’s path.

She waited there for the runner,

Oblivious to the aftermath.

He appeared from the shadows,

And she breathed in his spirits song,

She felt as though she’d never left him,

But he had continued on. 

And they sang together in the moonlight,

From the darkness of their caves,

100s of miles between them,

But nothing had really changed. 

It seems that time waits for no one,

As we swim through its sandy hills.

Only our faces wear the lines,

Etched by the battles of our wills.

They say it’s not about the outcome,

But about what we have learned.

Yet the grass is always greener,

After the lands been blackened and burned.

 As the darkness once more encompassed all,

she dropped the bloodied knife.

Devouring her lonely, tortured soul,

Memories of their once shared life.

For nostalgia beckons lonliness,

Fanciful versions of the truth,

We weep for a past that never happened,

The lost naivety of youth.

And he’s been to everywhere,

As he searches for the sun.

And she’s still only been to nowhere,

Yet time was filled with what she’d done.

They sing at last together,

For one final show,

As the distance fades away,

Their voices only grow.

Then like owls that bask in the moonlight,

They fly silently away,

Put forgotten pasts behind them,

On the path to somewhere new, today.


Be Careful What You Wish For

Be careful what you wish for,

Dreams can sneak up on you, you know.

In a state of prepared unpreparedness,

There’s never a right time to go.

If you can see into the future,

Predictions will take a hold of you,

Sometimes it’s better not knowing,

Muddling, drifting through.

Would I have travelled differently,

If I hadn’t known my fate?

No, because if I didn’t know I was restricted,

I may have left it all too late.

I believed in logic,

That’s where I held my faith,

Yet I always knew how things would play out,

And that I can’t explain.

Everything came to its natural conclusion,

Now this here final chapter is mine,

I’m pretending I’ll live happily ever after,

And in a way I am.

Although my ever is over,

All my wishes? They came true.

And of my regrets and longings,

I actually have very few.

Try to want what you have,

Don’t just have what you want,

And play the game with a smile.

Live each moment to the fullest,

We’re only here a while.

There’s never a right time to come into this world,

And never a right time to leave,

In the end, do with it what best you can,

Your journey is just a ‘passing through’.

Now’s my time for passing on,

Free from a mind of lies,

I lived a full life despite myself,

And I’m grateful for my trials


Phoenix 

 You can burn me today, but tomorrow I’ll rise,

For yesterday’s sun fuels the fire in my eyes,

The passion is increasing,

Its building inside me,

I’m starting back to believing,

That I’m knowing why,

Icarus is retreating

He’s leaving us be

And from yesterday’s ashes, tomorrow I’mma set free

As dawn cracks the early morning sky,

And the dust settles on yesterday’s high

I’m finally becoming,

me.

 And today? I will fly.

 I’m a Phoenix, I’m alive

I might be burned but I’m breathing

Freed of hatred and seething,

And from my scars comes a power,

The power of believing (in myself)

It’s a re birth that you are seeing

Cause I’m making my own day,

And living it my way,

You all think I’m crazy,

But you can’t deny what you’re seeing

I’ve risen from the ashes, now I’m golden and gleaming

I’m out of the fire, I’m my reason for being.

My soul flew into the fire and they left me to die

Nobody stopped them, no one even asked why

But words will always be there to save me,

they saturate when the well is dry beneath me,

when I’m surrounded by the madness,

 and the devil haunts my nights.

 My misty highway eyes are now sparkling and clear,

Ive given up on heartache

The brightest intensities appear at my door,

I’ve never seen so much of everything before,

The symbol on my wrist reminds me to stay true,

To the promise of a sequel,

 to what I’ve already given to you.

My story isn’t over yet, hell it’s only just begun

And I will fight for my future,

Until I know that I’ve won.

 I’m a Phoenix, I’m alive

I might be burned but I’m breathing

Freed of hatred and seething,

And from my scars comes a power,

The power of believing (in myself)

It’s a re birth that your seeing

 Cause I’m making my own day,

And living it my way,

You all think I’m crazy,

But you can’t deny what you’re seeing

I’ve risen from the ashes, now I’m golden and gleaming

I’m out of the fire, I am my reason for being.

 My black and white thinking once banished me to the blues,

But every shade of grey is now filled with vivid hues,

The colour of madness and the intensity of youth,

A manic predisposition of a beautiful truth.

I’m closer than I’ve ever been to everything at once,

Energy flows through me,

I’ve been given a second chance,

To prove my worth, once and for all,

An empowerment of everything,

Now I’mma stand tall

 I’m a Phoenix, I’m alive

I might be burned but I’m breathing

Freed of hatred and seething,

And from my scars comes a power,

The power of believing (in myself)

It’s a re birth that your seeing

Cause I’m making my own day,

And living it my way,

You all think I’m crazy,

But you can’t deny what you’re seeing

I’ve risen from the ashes, now I’m golden and gleaming

I’m out of the fire, I’m my reason for being.


Loaded Talk

Loaded talk,

And loaded guns

The power of silence

Is but second to none

You have built me up,

And talked me down,

I was lost,

But now I’m found.

I don’t deserve your love,

You don’t deserve my pain,

I hold you, tighter, closer,

Until finally I push you away.

Others would be over,

Why do you always stay?

How can you be my lover,

When I’m fighting you every day?

My loaded talk,

Wept through sleepless nights,

Still you walked the walk,

And avenged the fights.

I can’t breathe without you,

And you can’t leave without me.

We complement each other’s weakness

Devour each other’s strengths.

Yet to honour my pangs of neediness,

You have gone to such great lengths.

For hidden together in the shadows of time,

I’m yours and you are mine.


100 Broken Clocks

I have one hundred clocks, 

and none of them know the time,

but they’re still right twice a day,

when their broken arms align.

Symbols of a universal truth,

a measure of human kind,

the keepers of the memories,

their methodic tom’s and chimes.

It doesn’t really matter to me that I don’t know which when is true,

whenever something important happens,

it’s always a quarter past two.

100 weary faces, that can’t tell you the time,

can’t count away the hours,

your eyes melted hopelessly in mine.

200 hands wave pointlessly,

into the dead of the night

a potent reminder of eternity,

and the enormity of my fight.

The minutes tic along,

one step forward, two steps back.

Surrounded by the silence

and the hugeness of the fact,

that as each new dawn arises,

and the world awakens once more,

the last breath I take comes closer

counted by the man on the wall.

Now still those clocks lay there dormant,

my light long since gone out,

a reminder that time isn’t linear,

but measures of fear, of love and doubt.

So it doesn’t really matter,

that we’ll never really know,

which when is true,

because whenever something important happens,

it’s always a quarter past two.


Hats

Tell no one of your story

Tell no one of your woes

Tell no one of your secrets

Tell no one where you go.

I have 100 hats for the 100 people in my head,

the ones I don’t remember and the ones I still regret.

Together we told our stories, walked the walk and placed our bets.

They held me up, I held them down

I fought them off, they tried their best.

What makes us all so different,

when inside we are the same?

What chooses who comes out to play,

when we’re all stuck inside one brain?

If I write you all a memoir,

of the pasts that brought you here,

of battles fought in glory,

and the loves held true and dear.

If I give you each a story,

a chance to tell your side,

will you promise not to haunt me

as I drift alone in changing tides?

100 hats of different shapes,

100 heads of hair,

each of you might’ve known me

but none of you were there.

The day I died wasn’t hollow,

it wasn’t filled up with despair.

I just closed my eyes and thought of you,

and all that we had shared.

Now they gather in the meeting place,

to help finish each others work,

they can move on together now,

their life lessons have been learned.


In My Eyes

The world is eating you whole,

And I can’t even offer you protection,

Because when I look into your eyes,

All I see is my own reflection.

I know the pain that haunts you,

Is breaking you apart.

It was me who put that void there,

That hole that’s in your heart.

 I know that the very best of you,

Is despite the very worst of me.

I can’t apologise for hurting you,

I can’t set you free.

Cause it burns too much, it burns too much.

I can’t say I’m sorry,

For my half of your life,

I couldn’t teach you to be stronger,

now it’s you who holds the knife.

Cause it cuts too deep, it cuts too deep.

And as the blood rushes down our arms,

Bonded by our weakness,

And our failure to do no harm.

You are in my eyes and in my mind,

You hold my sadness inside yourself

You’re hiding behind your stallite blues,

windows to your soul, and vision of your truth.

Like my aunt before me,

And her uncle before that,

We share more than just the colour of our eyes,

Our secret sins are genetic facts

Behind the thinly veiled curtain,

Where our illness hide.

The probability becomes certain,

That you too will have to swim the tides.

Nothing can change us and we bare the battle scars,

But still nobody can blame us,

cause we are just who we are.

I know that the very best of you,

Is despite the very worst of me.

I can’t apologise for hurting you,

I can’t set you free.

Cause it burns too much, it burns too much.

I can’t say I’m sorry,

For my half of your life,

I couldn’t teach you to be stronger,

now it’s you who holds the knife.

Cause it cuts too deep, it cuts too deep.

And as the blood rushes down our arms,

Bonded by our weakness,

And our failure to do no harm.


Crossroads

Standing at the crossroads of life,

Decisions to be made, something’s gotta change.

Does he travel like a vagrant, across the coastal lands?

And search for life’s meaning, in the countless grains of sand?

Just him and his tent, with the wind in his hair.

The harshness of winter is forever unkind,

The distance too great, the hills too high.

Still he’s walked a hundred miles, just in his mind.

Back on the bus, heading home,

Once again, he sighs.

Because he’s falling…

Down the slippery slope of depression and pain,

Torturous potential, goals wasted in vain.

Fighting for freedoms but confined by the strain

And he’s falling…

Off the edge of reason and the price of fame,

White roses might save him, from realities claims.

It’s an infinite struggle, but he isn’t to blame.

Because he’s falling…

Conformity can’t hold him, he beats to his own drum

The pressure of society makes him want to run,

Run so fast, run from everyone,

Into the comforting arms, of whiskey and rum.

He’s got a ticket in his pocket, to escape his mind,

But as darkness comes, he pays only the fines.

Left from endless nights and endless lines.

He’s gotta make the decision to run or to fly.

Because he’s falling…

Down the slippery slope of depression and pain,

Torturous potential, goals wasted in vain.

Fighting for freedoms but confined by the strain

And he’s falling…

Off the edge of reason and the price of fame,

White roses might save him, from realities claims.

It’s an infinite struggle, but he isn’t to blame.

Because he’s falling…

And he’s gotta choose,

Between ‘fall back’ options and following his dreams,

The road might be long, the hills might be steep,

But sometimes rejection is familiar,

and failure is cheap.

Send him out again, singing in the same old spot.

He picks up his guitar, and gives it everything he’s got.

He’s booked a ticket to fly, he’s giving it another shot.

And if he ends up in the same place, then still nothing was lost.

Time waits for no man, but it bares its silent wrath,

Each step on the same road, wears a deeper path.

He’s only life is now, and he doesn’t want regrets.

The destination is meaningless, it’s about the journey that he takes.

And he was falling…

Down the slippery slope of depression and pain,

Torturous potential, goals wasted in vain.

Fighting for freedoms but confined by the strain

And he was falling…

Off the edge of reason and the price of fame,

White roses might save him, from realities claims.

It’s an infinite struggle, but he isn’t to blame.

He was falling…

But this time things won’t stay the same,

He was falling…

Now he’s standing up again.


Clinging to you

We’re the friends that you see in movies,

The ones that love never quite held.

The whole world around us could see it,

But we were blind to the spell.

While lovers who met by chance,

Basked in candle lit dinners and romance.

Oblivious to fates cohesion,

We just wrote songs about broken hearts.

Please pick me up,

and take me back to the past,

when we were just victims of clichés and circumstance.

The closing doors and passing trains,

Take me back to those twilight days.

 Let’s try again by the campfire,

To rekindle the sounds of our youth,

Strum me a lingering melody,

Tell your stories of passion and truth.

When the days were ours and the future was bright,

And we sang intoxicating lyrics long into the nights.

But I have let it grow so long,

From deep within my soul,

And now it’s time to let it go,

Time to climb up out of this hole.

Because a weathered statue is all that remains,

Of those fractured twilight days.

I spent so much time reminiscing,

Creating a history that’s thick with blame,

That I couldn’t see what I was missing,

My head was out of the game.

My misty highway eyes,

Once twinkling and blue,

Have become grey lifeless reminders,

Of a past spent clinging to you.

Memories of music and mountains,

And friends that are no longer around,

Have pointlessly cast me in a time warp,

Keeping me gagged and bound.

I repeat the loop endlessly,

As my life moves on ahead,

All chapters of the book I’ve written,

The book I’ve never read.

17 years have passed so quickly,

In the catacombs of my mind.

The outside world provided distraction,

From the life I left behind.

But I’m still stuck here drowning in a fantasy,

Imagining a time that will never be.

Memories of promises, hopes and expectations,

Reality caged our chances of being free.

But now I have to let it go,

because a weathered statue is all that remains,

Of those fractured twilight days.

I spent so much time reminiscing,

Creating a history that’s thick with blame,

That I couldn’t see what I was missing,

My head was out of the game.

My misty highway eyes,

Once twinkling and blue,

Have become grey lifeless reminders,

Of a past spent clinging to you.


Black Market of Fame

Take back the stars,

We can’t own the universe.

We’re busy fighting fires,

While they’re acting out an ancient curse.

They tell us to follow them,

And so we obey.

The irony of the soldiers

On you and me they prey.

A war without a reason,

So much money comes from pain.

No one even cares who started it,

To them it’s just a game.

They’ll sell our souls for a dollar,

Before they even know our names,

We vote willingly for leaders,

Found on the black market of fame.

They’ve warned us for years about,

The dangers of believing.

Everything it is they’re saying

But maybe what they’re saying

Is that no one really knows why.

Can we find the reasons?

Can we find the truth?

Is it hidden in the eye of the pyramid?

Window to the soul of the universe.

But still we patent life,

While countries starve to death.

Anarchy and strife,

Are all the world has left.


Symphony of Chaos 

(This was a hip-hop, mania inspired anti US president thought process)

IMG_8626Could you even conceptualise a compromise 

that won’t give rise to the pain and lies that I so despise

tantalised by my own demise, tried to look on the bright side

but the glare was burning my eyes, now Im fading

faster than a game show where I’m the prize.

Not so wise now, huh?

Jumped in too fast now you blown it?

Just suck it up, be a man and own it.

Puts hairs on your chest, don’t it?

It’s a symphony of chaos and I’m still out of tune

how am I supposed to reach for the moon,

while I’m scared and hiding up here in my room

like its some kind of tomb.

No Bull, but let me steer you in the right direction,

these cowards are begging for protection

you don’t need to rig an election to see whose home of the fRee

publicans will always have a place behind bars,

have you been living on Mars? It’s a total farce

Imagination threatening to kick our arse

how else you gunna get a bunch of Caucasians to

launch an invasion on some third world nation

when its just a ploy to hide your tax evasion,

damn straight its got me raging.

Tried to nail him but it was just a drill,

now we’re all screwed.

I can hear you from here

all your cells squealing in fear,

we’ve been waiting for a hero to appear so we could scream and cheer,

but spidermen’s drunk and he’s all out of beer

so now we just shout and jeer.

Quick, take me straight to Twitter,

surely anyone has gotta be fitter to lead 

than a lunatic this bitter, but he’s no quitter.

He’s persistent, like anxiety,

sitting at the top of the hierarchy, 

his little social media take down of society?

It’s really testing my sobriety.

Don’t point that water gun emoji at my head,

where’s my launch codes? Bam! You’re dead.

Hell fire and fury, there aint no time for a jury

Watch – it plays out like a bad movie,

where everyone dies in the ending, just wait, you’ll see

yep, it’s trending.

Its enough to drive anyone mad,

still confused about who’s actually bad?

Ive only got 140 characters to assassinate you with

sad.

I’m sure it’s only a fad, no one can actually be this stark raving mad,

and still grace the cover of celebrity mags.


 

The Flirty Feminist

The blog of an eclectic & eccentric woman

Flowers In The Brain

Mental health & day to day life

Elan Mudrow

Smidgens

My Loud Bipolar Whispers

Sharing my story and recovery journey of living, surviving and thriving with mental illness for over twenty five years to increase awareness, educate, reduce stigma, prevent suicide, inspire, give hope and let God's love shine through me and touch you...

Aria-Bella Rises

Inspiration to lead you back to Soul

Speaking Bipolar

Successfully living with Chronic Illness, Bipolar and Familial Mediterranean Fever

my multiple life

living life to the fullest with dissociative identity disorder and other mental illnesses

lifecanbebeautiful

Sharing self help tips/advice/blogs on how to make your life beautifully positive!

Becca-anne.x

" Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it is better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring" - Marilyn Monroe

Joanna Moncrieff

Books, papers and blogs by Joanna Moncrieff

midnightdemons7

one person's daily struggle with suicidal thoughts and chronic pain

Musings of The Bipolar Hot Mess

A home for bipolars and loved ones who need support

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